Cine-Manic

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2010-10-27T16:18:00.001+01:00

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Top Five- Time Travel Movies

2009-07-24T19:21:00.005+01:00

Ever since H.G. Wells wrote about a machine that could travel in time, the whole concept of time travel has captured the minds of millions. Needless to say, this concept has been used in countless books, movies, TV shows etc.

For this edition of Top Five I have narrowed down my favourite movies that use the time travel concept and as you will see, they all handle it differently. In thinking up this list I decided not to include movies where a character is frozen and re-awakes in the future, such as Planet of the Apes, as this isn't strictly time travel.

5. Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure

First off, this film takes all the conflicting theories about time travel and decides it could have more fun without them. Worried about paradoxes? Don't worry, it's perfectly ok to grab Beethoven, Socrates, Billy the Kid et al and bring them back to the present for the sole purposes of a school report. After all, Bill and Ted are already in a paradox. Their music saves the world in the future and are worshiped like gods, but how can they succeed without the help of Rufus from the future? Who cares? All we want is comedy, historical figures out of their depths, aerobic teaching Joan of Arcs, skateboarding Genghis Khans and watersliding Napoleans.

4. Groundhog Day

Whilst not as an original concept as most think (12:01 was also made that same year), Groundhog Day is a highly inventive and charming look at a man trapped in a loop. Every day he wakes up to the same tune on the radio, sees people doing exactly what they did the previous day, knowing that things will be the same tomorrow. What really lifts this movie well above what it could have been is the journey the character takes; at first he hates the town he is stuck in, then he uses his predicament to get what he wants, then after all that is exhausted he uses it to help people. His situation eventually gets him to see people in a loving way and to help them out, not just a few but nearly the entire population. He uses it to better himself and, in the end, he is a person that the whole town and his colleagues love. It's a touching story that piles on the laughs and is a worthy addition to the genre.

3. Terminator/Terminator 2: Judgement Day

Here are two excellent movies about time travel. The first see a man being sent from the future to protect a woman who will give birth to a great man. Also being sent back is a cyborg bent on terminating her before she can give birth to him. Once these two beings arrive there is no more physical time travel but the implications and paradoxes continue throughout. Sarah Conner is at first a timid mullet wearing woman who is thrust into a situation where she is being hunted and where she is told that she will train her son to be a great soldier. She is told of the destruction of the majority of Earth's population, she knows the date. She is told of a war that happens afterwards between the machines and the survivors of mankind.

In the second movie another terminator has been sent back to kill the son who is 12 years old, and to protect him another terminator, captured and 'tamed' has been sent back to protect him. Once again no more time travel is used once they arrive but the foreknowledge of events to come drive the story. Can they prevent the war? Can they stop the machines from becoming what they are? Does killing the man solely responsible for this make them any better than the machines? All this is dealt with in a way which is entertaining to an audience, we can enjoy this purely as an action movie, but if we wish, we can also look into the deeper messages.

2. 12 Monkeys

I love this movie, though I never at first. To me this agrees with my own theories on time travel; you cannot prevent what has already happened from happening.

Mankind has been enduring a virus that has killed off most people. The survivors live underground but scientists can send back James Cole to the past to gather information on the virus and maybe even obtain a sample of it in it's pure form so that a cure can be made. He also has to track down the army of the 12 monkeys who may have started all of this.

Unfortunately, time travel screws with your mind and being sent back to a strange time can lead you to being caught and put in a nut house if you aren't careful. Guess what? Cole wasn't careful. Throughout the story, Cole is treat as a mental patient, his story isn't believed, he is on the run from the law. His psychiatrist begins to slowly believe him but just as we the audience start to get our doubts. This movie deals with time travel but also insanity. Is Cole really from the future or is he insane? Perhaps it's both? He is also reminded of a dream he keeps having which may or may not be a memory of when he was a boy. A memory that gradually seems to be coming true as the story progresses, the characters becoming the people Cole is around.

There is a lot to get from this movie. A first viewing may or may not make you like it, but you definitely need to watch this at least twice because you will start to pick more things up, more paradoxes, more questions, more theories and more headaches. It truly does get greater with each viewing and cannot be justified in this post.

1. Back to the Future Trilogy

Not only is this one of the best time travel movies, it is one of the best movies ever, period. The script is incredible in it's comedy, plot arch and characters. This is all brought to life by brilliant directing, effects and a perfect cast.

Time travel in this movie works this way: You can change anything that has happened in the past, but it will have severe consequences on the future. The last thing you want to do is prevent your own birth...which is what Marty McFly does within his first few hours of arriving back in 1955. The movie is a race against time to get his young mum and dad together before he fades away out of memory. The second two movies, although not planned at all during the making of the first, brilliantly add on to this story. We see Marty go back, yet again, to 1955, where he has to avoid his past self whilst interacting with the events we witnessed in the first movie. Not only that, we see a glimpse of the future, 2015, and get a lesson in paradoxes when a character from 2015 goes back to 1955 and changes history. We see how this effects the present, and also the character in the future (he quickly fades away after coming back from the past).

Some people dismiss this as confusing and not as good as the first. While the latter is true, the second movie is still hugely entertaining and explains time travel and paradoxes in a way that no other movie has been able to do (who can forget Doc's diagram on the blackboard?).

The third movie, only deals slightly with the issues that the first two did, but is still a great movie, entertaining in the same vein as the others and a great way to end the trilogy.

So, what are YOUR favourite movies that deal with time travel? No doubt you will disagree with my list but it would be enjoyable to see what you think of it and to name your own. Feel free to put all thoughts and ideas in the comments section below.

Wilhelm Scream- Sunshine

2009-07-21T19:13:00.003+01:00

In Sunshine a group of scientists head towards the dying Sun in an attempt to re-ignite it. The ship is protected by a large heat shield that covers the entire front. Captain Kaneda (Hiroyuki Sanada from Ringu) and Capa (Cillian Murphy) are out on the shield making some repairs. The clock is ticking as the shield is slowly turning back into the sunlight which, at this close distance, would be fatal.

This has to be my all time favourite movie death, it's beautiful to watch, John Murphy's score is incredible and it's perhaps the best way to go if you had to choose.

Wilhelm Scream- Hot Fuzz

2009-07-18T23:21:00.006+01:00

In a new feature we celebrate and commemorate the best on-screen deaths to hit our screen. May they Rest in Peace.

In a village where people are getting killed one after the other, you'd think that you'd be safe outside of a church, in broad daylight, with the whole village just around the corner wouldn't you? Not so for reporter Tim (Adam Buxton). He has some important information regarding the killings but before he can say anything to new cop on the beat (Simon Pegg) he meets his messy demise.

Classic Scene- The Sixth Sense

2009-07-14T20:49:00.002+01:00

In 1999 The Sixth Sense became a huge success making writer and director M. Night Shyamalan almost a household name, if only people knew how to pronounce it.

One of the big factors in it's popularity was the big twist at the end which, for me, ruined the movie slightly. I thought the twist was unnecessary as the movie was solid without it, and the twist was also a bit daft. The rest of the movie, though, was hugely entertaining, scary at times, directed brilliantly and actually had a kid who could act and not be annoying.

Haley Joel Osment was only ten or eleven when he made this, but he managed to stand up alongside Bruce Willis (who also did a good job) and add the critical depth to one of the most important characters.

In this scene, towards the end of the movie (it should have finished around this scene really) we see Cole (Osment) and his mum(Toni Collette) stuck in a traffic jam after an accident. Up until this point Cole hasn't spoken too much to her, especially regarding his secret which led to him having to see a shrink.

I love this scene, it's one of the ones that make me cry even after watching it again just now (dammit) it just does so much in 5 minutes and yet it's pure dialogue.

Review- リング (Ringu)

2009-07-10T23:59:00.007+01:00

There's been a recent trend of Japanese horror (or J-horror) in movies, with plenty of remakes coming out of Hollywood; some good, some not so good.

The one movie that set the wagon rolling was リング (Ringu) meaning 'Ring', made in 1998 with a low budget of $1.2 million. It went on to become the highest grossing horror from in Japan, spawned several sequels and remakes in Korea and Hollywood.

The first thing that got me interested was the premise, which quite unique for a movie of this particular type. Basically, there's a video going around that has strange images on it, once the video ends the phone rings. You then have one week before you die.

Reiko Asakawa (the beautiful Nanako Matsushima) is a reporter who is investigating the story of this rumoured video that all the teenagers are talking about. Her niece, Tomoko, is seen in the first scene telling her friend that she and a few others took a trip to Izu and ended up watching a weird video and got a call saying that they would die in one week, which just happens to end that night. Sure enough, she mysteriously dies and her friend goes loony and ends up in a hospital.

At the funeral Reiko discovers that Tomoko's friends also died that night in separate incidents. She comes across some photos that Tomoko had taken on their trip to Izu the week before and as she flips through them notices one where all their faces are blurred and distorted. She decides to take a trip to Izu and, with the aid of the photos, finds the cabin in which they stayed in and also the video. As she watches it there is a woman coming her hair in a mirror, which quickly jumps revealing a little girl, a man pointing with a cloth over his head, the word 'eruption', and eye with 'Sada' written in it and several other images, ending on a well before cutting to static noise. Immediately afterwards the phone rings and Reiko answers, though we do not hear what is on the other side. Reiko now now assumes she only has a week left. The time is 7:10 pm.

The next day she calls her ex-husband over. Ryuji Takayama (the excellent and awesome Hiroyuki Sanada) comes over and takes Reiko's picture with a polaroid. It comes out blurred and distorted, just like the one of the teenagers. Ryuji watches the video but apparently there is no phone call.

'Hopefully not another chick flick'

Reiko makes a copy of the tape for them to study and they find clues within the video which leads them Oshima island, although Reiko's son, Yoichi has also watched the video.

The pair discover the story of a woman named Shizuko who claimed to have psychic powers, but at a demonstration of her talent the press turned on her and she eventually ended up killing herself. Shizuko appears to be the woman in the video combing her hair in the video and it seems that her daughter Sadako may have made the video, she too has powers it seems.

With one day left, Reiko and Ryuji head back to the cabin and discover a well underneath it, as well as the shocking truth behind Sadako. Are they both cursed to die one week after watching the tape? If so can this curse be broken?

Now Ringu is described as a horror and as such, many people sit down to watch this movie and be terrified. I don't class it as a horror, but it works more as a suspense/mystery/thriller type thing. You see, a typical horror movie will give you a nice scare at the beginning and then sprinkle scares throughout as more teenagers gets killed off etc. But, Ringu works a lot differently. Sure, you get the great first scene with the two teenage girls, one worried that she has seen the video. Is the whole thing a joke or not? We're not sure until the end of the scene when Tomoko is killed. However, the rest of the movie is unraveling the mystery of the video and who made it. We do not know if Reiko will die after one week or not, but signs point to the possibility. Her husband is skeptical at first but then he too is lead to believe that they are both cursed after watching it. The whole plot is a gradual build up to the end scenes, raising the tension and the mystery. We only find out things as our protagonists do, we are drawn into this investigation with them.

I believe this is why a lot of people are let down by this, because the structure is so different from what they were expecting when they heard this was a horror movie. If you approach this as a suspense then you are prepared for the slow build up. This movie doesn't rely on cheap scares, most of the movie in fact doesn't contain anything scary or creepy at all. The clock is ticking for Reiko (or is it?) and the clues come slowly and you don't know where all of it is leading to. You have to sit through it and experience what she does as she contemplates her fate and worries about her son.

Hideo Nakata directs this and does a good job, there are a couple of short scenes in particular which are done really well. One example is when Ryuji is sat on a bench and is approached by a mysterious woman (Ryuji is psychic and what he sees is a vision). The scene goes from having the bustle of a busy part of the city to suddenly fading away to silence leaving only her footsteps. We only see her feet and legs and Ryuji never looks up, we get a great bit of camera work as it sweeps around him and then the scene is back to normal. The whole thing only lasts 30 seconds and is a 'what the hell?' type of scene for a lot of people.

The great Hiroyuki Sanada; his spidey sense is tingling

Yes, Ryuji is psychic but it is not revealed outright in an obvious way. The aforementioned scene, though, is the first time this is confirmed although a lot of people didn't pick up on it. It is not uncommon in a lot of Japanese movies of this genre to include someone who is psychic.

This brings me onto the second reason why I think a lot of people were either disappointed or didn't quite 'get' Ringu, not the plot but how it was told. It is essential to understand that Eastern stories are told a lot differently than they are in the West. A typical legendary Chinese or Japanese ghost story will have elements that would be completely alien in a Western ghost story. Even the way they sometimes structure stories, and as such tell these in cinema and television, can be quite different from what Westerners are used to. This can lead to some people being a bit put off in watching Eastern cinema as there are elements they don't understand.

Thankfully, anime is very popular among Western youths and hopefully this will mean that new generations will be more willing to explore, not just anime, but Eastern cinema as a whole, being used to how they tell stories and portray characters. The biggest advantage that I feel Eastern Cinema is over Hollywood is that it rarely dumbs down. It doesn't usually hand-feed the audience with what is going on, it doesn't worry that the audience may not get something in the story. Instead it, mostly, concentrates on keeping the script at a point were it is written well enough for anyone patient and willing to work things out for themselves.

Now I mentioned there aren't any cheap scares, but the movie does come close to it on a couple of occasions. When Reiko finishes watching the video we see a reflection of someone in the TV, but nobody is actually there. This is very similar to how a Hollywood horror would work, but instead of an huge burst from the score to say 'jump now' it is slightly more restrained so that, rather than jumping, you begin to catch your breath but then it is over as quickly as it began.

Kenji Kawai does the score which mostly comprises of a dread-inspiring sound of strings being stretched, plucked and stroked whenever something scary happens. This again puts the movie into a different tone. We rarely jump when this happens, instead we get a sense of dread and unease which lasts up until the great ending of the movie.

Watching the video gives you a good poker face

Nanako Matsushima is wonderfully cast as the female lead, she is full of grace at the start, but as the week progresses she becomes desperate for herself and for her son. Hiroyuki Sanada, who plays her ex-husband is one of my favourite Japanese actors, he is just fantastic in this and, rightfully so, is slowly getting roles in Hollywood movies. He has appeared in The Last Samurai and was the great Kaneda in Danny Boyle's Sunshine (best death ever). I hope he continues to gain more roles so that a larger audience can appreciate just how good he is.

Ringu is a great piece of Japanese suspense and, if approached as such and not as horror, the audience should have a great hour and half.

A quick note on the remake

In 2002 there was a remake of this. I would like to state that on the whole this remake is very good. It is, however, a proper horror movie, with more intense images and plenty of 'jumpy' moments which are all very effective and well done, and has a completely different feel to Ringu.

There is a problem that anyone who has seen this remake first may not get as much out of Ringu as they should. It is a mystery movie, but as The Ring shares a similar plot and conclusion, viewers will already know the outcome, let alone the surprise ending. I would recommend that both version of the movie be watched as they are both good in their own right and style, but if possible watch Ringu first and then The Ring. The Ring, with its horror based structure can be easily enjoyed when knowing the basic storyline, whereas Ringu would be ruined a lot by this foreknowledge.

Best Line:
This kind of thing... it doesn't start by one person telling a story. It's more like everyone's fear just takes on a life of its own.

Star Turn:
Hiroyuki Sanada, I could watch him all day, a great actor.

Best Moment:
THE scene

Review- Coming to America

2009-07-08T23:30:00.003+01:00

The 1980's; a time when Eddie Murphy movies were funny and none more so, in my opinion, than Coming to America (1988).

Based on a story by Murphy himself, this classic comedy was directed by John Landis, who had success with Murphy in Trading Places. Whilst that movie concerned Murphy's character going from rags to riches, this movie is almost the opposite.

Eddie Murphy plays Prince Akeem, heir to the throne of Zamunda, in Africa He is pampered 24 hours a day, from a small string section playing music to wake him up, to the three servants who sprinkle rose petals in front of him as he walks. Unlike his father the King, played by the almighty James Earl Jones, Akeem is growing tired of this lifestyle and thinks even less to the prospect of marrying someone he is only going to meet later that day.

Akeem decides to travel to America with his friend and servant Semmi (Arsenio Hall) to look for a woman he can fall in love with and marry. They end up in Queens, New York (where better to find a wife for a king?) and Akeem tells Semmi that they are to live as everyone else does, nobody is to know of their wealth; Akeem wants a woman to love him for who he is, not because of his power or money.

Coming to America, however, does not really enter the familiar territory of a 'fish out of water' scenario. Sure, there are situations that Akeem does not understand ('what does dumb fuck mean?') but mostly the pair settle in to the New York way of like, Akeem embracing the challenges and Semmi loathing them.

Blending in with the New Yorkers

Akeem eventually finds a woman named Lisa, whose father owns a fast-food restaurant named McDowell's, and decides that she could be a woman suitable for him. Akeem and Semmi get a job working for Mr McDowell, mopping the floor and taking out the garbage, so that Akeem can get to know Lisa, despite the fact that she is going out with rich boyfriend Darryl (ER's Eriq La Salle).

As the movie progresses Akeem and Lisa get close, especially when she breaks up with Darryl, but Lisa still thinks that he is just a goat herder from Africa. Akeem is trying to find the right occasion to tell her the truth when his parents suddenly arrive and threaten to ruin everything before Akeem can do it his own way.

It's a simple and cute story which is handled more than adequately, however this is a comedy and, as such, relies more on laughs than story. It surely does deliver on that front and it's main triumph are the characters.

Despite being the protagonist in a comedy, Akeem isn't that funny. He is a very warm and likable guy who is sincere in wanting to find true love and cares not about what he has back home. But, he doesn't get much opportunity to make us the audience laugh, save for the occasional struggles with Western culture. For example, to initiate small talk about football he states 'Oh sir, the Giants of New York took on the Packers of Green Bay. And in the end, the Giants triumphed by kicking an oblong ball made of pigskin through a big "H". It was a most ripping victory.'

Other than these small occurrences, we laugh more about his situations rather than what he says or does. Eddie Murphy is not redundant on the comedy side, though, as this is the first time where he plays multiple characters, which has become common these days but never any better than here.

He plays a old barber named Clarence, who enjoys arguing with his old friends about boxing, 'every time I start talkin 'bout boxing, a white man got to pull Rocky Marciano out their ass', and whether or not he met Martin Luther King. He plays Randy Watson, a terrible front man for Sexual Chocolate, who play a hilarious version of 'The Greatest Love of All' at a Black Awareness meeting, and he also plays Saul, an old white Jew were he is barely recognizable. All of these roles allow Murphy to shine with his energetic comedy and pile on the laughs, in stark contrast to Akeem who is almost a straight man.

Oy vey! It's Eddie Murphy

Arsenio Hall steals the show, though. Despite his huge success in 80's America, he is not so well known outside of the states, but here he truely does come into a world of his own. His main character, Semmi, is almost the opposite to Akeem; he is sex mad, hates living in the poor conditions in New York and despises having to work. It is not long before he is flaunting his money and endangers giving up Akeem's secret. He lives for fun and is never afraid to reveal his joker-like smile, and big gums.

Hall also gets to play other characters alongside Murphy's. His first we meet is a one of the old folks in the barbers having the boxing argument, 'his mamma call him Clay, imma call him Clay', his second is Reverend Brown, perhaps the most disturbing minister ever in cinema. He is both disgusting and amusing as he is checking out the beauty pageant contestants and, despite only occuring in two scenes, he is one of the most memorable characters throughout the entire movie.

Most of these characters and the scenes in which they appear add little, if nothing to the movie plot-wise. Despite this, it detracts nothing at all as they are hugely entertaining and funny and acted out excellently by both Murphy and Hall, with some great support by various actors; a special shout out to Clint Smith is needed who is great and stands his own as Sweets in the barber shop.

There are so many wonderful moments in this movie, from the hilarious Soul Glow advert that keeps raising it's head, to the scene were Akeem and Semmi go out to meet women in a club, only to find they are all a bit odd (including one scary woman who is Arsenio in drag). There are also many quoatable lines which is a bonus for any comedy movie, 'Believe me. I tied my own shoes once. It is an overrated experience. '

Eddie Murphy believes the children are our future

The direction by Landis is also good, especially in the scenes with Murphy and Hall's multiple characters. Landis does this seamlessly and, thanks to Rick Baker's fantastic make-up effects, it is easy to forget that you are watching the same people. In fact some viewers fail to notice that some characters are played by Murphy or Hall.

It's hard to think that Coming to America is almost 2 hours in length, it just flies past and feels like any 90 minute comedy. It is a great portrayal of both Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall's comedic and character acting ability with fully realised characters, showing that a good comedy doesn't always need a completely ridiculous plot for the laughs to come. Instead it shows that it can be done by using a simple premise and getting the laughs out of the characters themselves.

Best Line:
Now let's see if you can defend yourself, you sweat from a baboon's balls.

Star Turn:
Arsenio Hall, a joy to watch and his other characters are so funny

Best Moment:
Sexual Chocolate

Classic Scene- Good Will Hunting

2009-07-05T16:24:00.002+01:00

Here is a movie from 1997, which put Matt Damon and Ben Affleck on the map (for good or for worse). They co-wrote the screenplay and won the Oscar for it. Damon plays a kid genius who is always in trouble with the law and so is sent to a psychiatrist (Williams) and tutored in Mathematics as part of his 'get out of jail free' clause.

The first meeting with the shrink doesn't go well, when Damon sees a paint-by-numbers picture and proceeds to psychologically de-construct the shrinks life, touching on his dead wife.

This scene is their next meeting and shows Robin Williams in perhaps his best role (he won an Oscar for this also). This is were their relationship really starts as Williams shows that Damon, despite bing a genius and despite having read many books on many topics, really knows nothing about life, love and death. It is a great monologue and performed wonderfully.

Top Five-Bad Hollywood Remakes

2009-07-04T19:40:00.005+01:00

5. The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)

It's a typical remake. A perfect excuse to get the computers running on overtime to animate the end of the world. Keanu Reeves is his normal wooden self as alien Klaatu trying to sap all the energy out of this movie. There is a common downfall to this movie that occurs in a lot of remakes they seem to forget the message that the original was trying to convey. The original movie made in 1951 was a wonderful look at mankind and it's violent tendencies which is even more apt these days. Yet, the remake only makes vague references to this, only using it as the aliens' excuse to destroy the planet. The movie, despite having a lot of destruction and pretty effects is quite boring compared to other similar movies and even the pure beauty of Jennifer Connelly cannot help this poor attempt.

4. Psycho (1998)

Oh dear! If there was ever a movie that didn't need a remake, it was Psycho. One of my most favourite movies ever, directed by one of the most influential people, with a superb performance by Anthony Perkins, everything was just right.

So along comes Gus Van Sant, fresh off directing the brilliant Good Will Hunting and decides, not only to remake Psycho, but also to do it almost shot for shot! But this time, let's get an inferior actor (Vaughn) to play the iconic role, let's slip some daft 'subliminal' shots in random places and generally ruin a perfect movie.

This isn't even a movie that has big special effects etc, which is usually the excuse for a remake. Overall this is not only a pathetic remake, but an unnecessary one.

3. I Am Legend (2007)

Now this is a half-decent movie, but again it fell into the aforementioned trap of failing to grasp and convey they message. Not only did it do this but ti also completely changed the ending of the original novel and hence completely changed (or discarded) the whole point that the book was making. Even the alternate ending was a bad attempt at trying to rectify this. The title of this movie makes no sense whatsoever with the changes they made.

What makes this so frustrating is that this remake was in various hands for well over a decade, at one point James Cameron was to direct Arnie. All this time to go on, the opportunity of a fantastic novel to base the screenplay around, and yet it ends up in the hands of the guy who is writing the Oldboy remake!

Add that to that fact that the creatures in the movie (are they vampires or zombies? it doesn't make it clear. They are supposed to be vampires) are so badly made that they look like something out of Doctor Who or Primeval. The whole movie looks like an excuse to show New York deserted and derelict (which looks amazing) and have Will Smith moping around and getting his shirt off (which looks amazing *cough*) and have a Bob Marley soundtrack.

There are plenty of people who loved this movie. To those I say read the novel by Richard Matheson and watch The Last Man on Earth (1964). Not only is the book a highly important work of art in it's genre, but it an intelligent look at the vampire mythos with attempts to understand them from a scientific standpoint. Not only that but the 'twist' totally changes how we see the vampires and als the protagonist.

Dam, even The Omega Man (1971) did a better job.

2. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

I'll start this by saying I'm not really a fan of the Burton/Depp joint projects. I think Burton has too much style and no substance and that Depp is wasted on quirky characters, he's a great actor. But when I watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory it made me think a whole lot less of the pair.

They took a magical kids film and sucked all of the magic out of it. In fact, they sucked all the fun out also. This was not enjoyable at all; the songs were crap and forgettable, the oompa-lumpa's were just awful, Depp sounded like he was doing a bad impression of Dr Evil and, once again, the message of the original was completely lost.

In the original one it's made clear to children that Charlie won because he was innocent and he was a good natured kid, even when Willy Wonka turns out to be Willy Wanker (or so we are lead to believe). His refusal to hand in the gobstopper to Wonka's so-called competition was his final test. So, as in all of Roald Dhals stories, it is a fun story with a little lesson for the kids. Here, however, we have just under two hours of boring, non-magical and non-fun drivel, with terrible performances and dire directing, and the audience comes away with nothing from it.

1. King King (2005)

Well, here we have number one, the worst remake ever, in my opinion. King Kong, everyone's favourite movie about inferred bestiality.

Peter Jackson claimed that this was his favourite movie (the original, that is) and always wanted to remake it. Now, first of all, why on earth would you want to remake your favourite movie? Secondly, why would you then, given the opportunity, completely destroy the legacy of King Kong and replace with a drawn out, badly acted and directed, badly paced, badly CGI'd mess of a movie?

The extended edition is 201 minutes long. I like a long movie, if i'm enjoying it then I wanna see the longest edit possible. But King Kong had so much crap in it, and unnecessary crap at that, he could have easily shortened it to two hours tops. Naomi Watts is a brilliant actress, but for some reason she is terrible in this. Adrian Brody is good also and yet in this he is bland. Jack Black is crap and annoying, yet he doesnt break his trend in this movie.

King Kong himself was brilliant animated, but it looks like too much focus was placed on this as other effects looked awful, especially the scene when they are running down the canyon with the dinosaurs. Scenes just dragged for too long, the battle of the dinosaurs with king kong, I didnt care about anything apart from how numb my arse was getting.

I like Peter Jackson, I liked his earlier worked and I love the LOTR trilogy. It was a great achievement to get it made and it mostly stands up well. Therefore, it baffles me just how he managed to make this so bad, not just bad, but soooooo bad. $207 million went into this, and it mostly went on geeks sat at a computer. For less than half of that they could have tightened the script, shortened the movie (and hence the number of effects) and made a better movie.

The original is famous for the quote 'It was beauty killed the beast' well, in the remake it was the fat beast that killed the beauty.

Review- Dog Day Afternoon

2009-07-01T15:19:00.006+01:00

Al Pacino's career can be divided in half. The first half consists of him out-acting anybody around at that time, the second half is his shouty phase. Now, I do like his shouty phase, I thought he was great in Scent of a Woman and Devil's Advocate and also in lesser roles, but what I really miss is his ability to perform like he does in this movie.

Dog Day Afternoon (1975) for me is the pinnacle of Al Pacino's acting ability, one of my favourite roles that he has played and one of the best movies from the seventies.

Directed by Sidney Lumet, Dog Day is the true story of a man who robs a bank with his friend. Pacino plays Sonny Wortzik, an ex bank employee who supposedly knows how everything works in a bank. Unfortunately for him, the bank has no money in the vault, so what turns out to be a quick job soon turns into a botched operation. When the police are alerted to what is going on Sonny holds the bank employees hostage.

It doesn't take long for word to get out and pretty soon half of the city is outside the bank watching this spectacle, all the press and all the local people. Surprisingly, Sonny is a likable guy, he seems to be doing this out of desperation, and the majority of the female work staff quickly take a liking to him, often joking with him. His friend Sal (John Cazale) however, is a quiet, anxious guy who seems to be willing to actually hurt someone if things go wrong.

It's going to be a long afternoon

Outside are the police force, guns in hand, and Detective Moretti who is trying to lead the negotiations. Sonny does come outside a few times to talk and each time the police seem more than happy to shoot him, much to the frustration of Moretti who is trying to gain Sonny's trust. Sonny, knowing that all the news stations are filming him, knows this and shouts that the cops want blood, they want to see him dead on the street. He reminds them all of the Attica Prison incident which happened earlier, which involved prison inmates being shot by state police during a riot and re-takeover of the prison. He shouts 'Attica, Attica' over and over in a scene that has now become famous and spoofed many times. The crowd cheer him, they seem to be on his side as this circus gets bigger and more crazy.

Throughout the day Sonny rises in popularity with his hostages and with the large crowd outside. The whole thing is now one big media event, even the pizza guy who brings a delivery to the bank cannot believe his luck and even proclaims 'I'm a f***king star' to the press. But things are getting desperate and so Sonny comes up with a plan to ask for a jet so they can fly off out of the country.

'Wyoming isn't a country, Sal'

We find out why Sonny needs the money, which in turn reveals more of who he is (despite many write-ups revealing this 'twist' in the synopsis). The FBI also step in and they are less than willing to cooperate which makes Sonny and especially Sal more desperate. The only thing left is to see if Sonny and Sal get away.

The performances throughout are exceptional, partly down to the cast, partly direction. A lot of what was said was improvised, which Lumet encouraged and so it feels so natural which is important considering it's a true story. As mentioned earlier, this is one of Pacino's best example of his acting ability, both outright and subtly. He creates a character who is obviously in the wrong but someone you can sympathize with andget to like within a short amount of time. He has to battle mixed emotions as his plans fall apart, as things get out of hand his desperation and frustration begin to show. He also has a hatred of the police force outside waiting to kill him, he wants the hostages to like him, he plays up for the crowds and cameras and he has to come to turns with how his actions affect his mother and wife.

The pressure of being a criminal and a celebrity

There are so many great bits to this movie and, despite being a crime drama, it provides plenty of laughs. You can't help but laugh at one of the hostages wanting to go back inside with Sonny, the TV interview Sonny gives live from the bank, Sal being asked which country he wants to go to ('Wyoming'), the pizza guy, Sonny unable to get his gun out quickly at the start. The list is endless.

It's a fascinating study of the media, and celebrity, how something like this could capture the imagination of the public and make a criminal a local celebrity in a matter of hours. This fully deserved it's Oscar nominations, unfortunately it only won one for original screenplay, being robbed by One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest for best picture, Jack Nicholson also getting best actor.

If you have only seen Al Pacino in his shouty phase and also in Godfather, then certainly check him out in this naturalistic role. This is a fantastic movie, very entertaining and interesting in that it is all true. The best movie of 1975 by far.

Best Line:
Sal, Wyoming's not a country

Star Turn:
Pacino, one of his best roles ever. Enough said.

Best Moment:
Sonny trying to get his gun out in the bank

Review-A Simple Plan

2009-06-30T20:31:00.006+01:00

A Simple Plan (1998) was based on a novel by Scott B Smith and was directed by Sam Raimi. I'm not really a Raimi fan, I don't like the Spiderman movies, Evil Dead was a bit 'meh', but I did enjoy The Quick and the Dead and even For Love of the Game, surprisingly.

A Simple Plan sees Hank Mitchell (Bill Paxton), his brother Jacob (Billy Bob Thornton) and Jacob's friend Lou stumbling across a small plane that has crashed not far outside the small town which they live in. It is around new year and the area is covered with thick snow so the plane hasn't been found by anyone else. When they go inside they find a dead pilot and a bag containing more than $4 million in hundred dollar bills.

$4.4 million, not bad for a walk in the woods

They decide to split it but in order not to get caught, Hank takes it with him to hide until spring, when the plane is discovered and then, if it is safe, they will take their share and leave town. Hank and Lou don't get on too well and so there is distrust straight away from Lou, but Hank says that's the only way he'll do it or he'll burn the money or hand it in.

After counting it and loading it in the truck, they see a car approaching which happens to be Sheriff Jenkins. Jacob accidentally asks 'did you mention the plane?' in front of the sheriff. Now Jacob isn't the brightest of guys, he gets nervous easily, not exactly the looker of the year either. After making an excuse of saying they heard a plane that may have had engine trouble, the sheriff leaves.

Hank brings the money to his expecting wife Sarah (Bridget Fonda) who at first says they can't take it, but soon changes her mind that night in bed after obviously thinking about it all evening. She schemes and tells Hank to put about half a million back so that when the plane and money is found people may not look for any more. He goes back the next day with Jacob as lookout, but without Lou knowing about it. On his way back from the plane he sees old man Dwight on a snowmobile talking to Jacob. As he approaches he's muttering 'don't do anything stupid Jacob'. Well, obviously Jacob didn't hear that as he introduces Dwight's head to a crowbar, presumably killing him.

Hank drives the body on the snowmobile to hide the body when Dwight suddenly wakes up telling Hank to get the police to get his brother. Hank smothers him to protect Jacob and then rides the snowmobile off a bridge to make it look like an accident. When Jacob panics and wants to confess what he did, Hank tells him that it was he who had killed Dwight when he woke up.

'I said smother him with your love...not glove'

As the winter goes on, things get harder for the three guys. Hank is worried that Jacob may do something foolish again, Lou is worried that Hank will betray them and keep the money for himself. Lou goes over and asks for his share and when Hank refuses Lou tells him that his brother had told him all about what had happened to the old man and will tell the sheriff.

The second half of the story involves Hank and Sarah scheming to protect themselves against Hank and from being found out about the money at all, Sarah suggests getting Lou drunk and recording him falsely confessing to murdering the old man. The first part of the plan goes well until Lou finds out, not only Hanks plot, but also that his friend Jacob has betrayed him. Things get really ugly when, whilst defending his brother, Jacob shoots Lou (his only friend) and then Hank has to kill Lou's wife when she tries to kill him.

Hank and Jacob have little time to come up with a story to convince the sheriff that they are innocent, not to mention the new complication of an FBI agent who has arrived looking for a plane and been told that Hank had heard one in trouble not long ago.

Can Hank get the law off his back? Can he prevent his brother do any more stupid things? Is this FBI agent to be trusted at all?

I really enjoyed watching this movie again, it is effective from the start as it immediately draws the audience into asking themselves what they would do, and how they would get away with it. Then, as it development unfolds we are left wondering how they can possibly carry on.

Billy Bob Thornton, who is always good at playing these rolls, is perhaps the standout in this movie. His character Jacob is a bit of a fool, but has some good sense at times and even knows a few home truths that Hank doesn't. His tendency to panic threatens to ruin their plans several times, which puts the audience on edge as to what he might do next. He's also a guy you can feel sorry for, he's alone apart from his brother and his only friend. He's also guilt ridden by what he has done to the old man, and then to Lou and struggles to come to turns with it all.

The wife, Sarah, is also very interesting. She doesn't want the money at first but very quickly changes her mind and then also begins to come up with plans to help themselves, she becomes so involved that she excuses Hank's killing of Dwight and tries to set up Lou.

This movie is 2 hours long and it is enjoyable throughout and looks great filmed in the snowy countryside and small town. There are several developments to push the story along. Most characters go through a change of opinion on what to do with the money, you're not sure whether there will be any betrayal or not and you're constantly wondering how they are all going to get away with this as things steadily spiral out of control.

This is definitely worth 2 hours of your time.

Best Line:
Do you ever feel evil?

Star Turn:
Billy Bob Thornton; creepy,unsettling, dangerously thoughtless, capable of anything

Best Moment:
Hank unsure of the FBI agent

Review-Gattaca

2009-06-28T19:24:00.016+01:00

Gattaca (1997) was written and directed by Andrew Niccol and, though it passed under the radar of the general audience, it is an intelligent and stylish science fiction movie.

Vincent Freeman (Ethan Hawke) has dreamt of venturing into space all of his life and has worked hard to become qualified for it. The only catch is this: Vincent was born naturally, which is against the current practice of being genetically engineered. People born naturally are labeled ‘invalids’ and are discriminated heavily against, putting them in a lower class and with no chance of attaining anything great in their lives. All the prominent careers go to the ‘valids’, the ones who have been given the best genes from both parents and these can go on to do pretty much anything they want to.

A stylish and fashion conscious future

Vincent finds an opportunity to take a valid’s identity, a practice that is becoming common in the black market. He meets up with Jerome Morrow (Jude Law) who has a very high genetic profile, but was rendered wheelchair bound after breaking his back. Vincent can now use Jerome’s identity as a valid to get into Gattaca where all the space missions are run. In order to pass as Jerome he needs constant urine samples, blood samples, hair samples etc to pass the constant tests that keep Gattaca free from invalids. He also tries to get rid of any of his own DNA by cleaning his workstation constantly and taking vigorous showers and minimizing any dead skin that could give him away.

After a grueling interview process (literally just a urine sample) Vincent gains access to Gattaca and soon comes in line to venture off into space. All goes well until the final week before the mission when the mission director is murdered. Police investigating find an eyelash belonging to Vincent who has been missing since he took up Jerome’s identity. Vincent is innocent of the murder but the police don’t know that and, besides, catching him will reveal that he is an invalid posing as a valid.

Alan Arkin investigates

We now have Vincent’s struggle to remain unnoticed by both the police who suspect him to be a murderer and testing everyone for DNA, and the Gattaca Corporation from discovering his true identity.

What I like about this movie first of all is that it is set in a semi-plausible future. If we could genetically engineer our children if we wished, how would the natural ‘inferior’ people be treated? Technically they are inferior but does anyone have the right to discriminate against them? Racism and sexism seem to be done away with to make way for a prejudice on a genetic level and your parents’ choice in reproduction methods will affect your future. These are obviously the themes that the movie explores the most but there are numerous others that it deals with from human spirit, ‘what is perfection?’, personal identity and sibling rivalry to name but a few.

The whole movie looks great, from the stylish suits and outfits that could come right out of a 50’s noir movie, to the sets which, again, go for style rather than the ‘hey this is a sci-fi movie, let’s go crazy’ craze of bigger budget equivalents.

The acting is good all round; Hawke is a confident guy despite his ‘disadvantage’, Law is the depressed guy despite his ‘perfections’ but learns much from Vincent. Uma Thurman, looking more elegant than ever, plays Vincent’s colleague and love interest well, you never know her agenda and as she gets close to discovering the truth you’re unsure as to how she will respond. The support cast is equally as good by the likes of Alan Arkin as the detective, Xandar Berkeley as the doctor who does the daily tests and Gore Vidal as director of Gattaca.

Anyone wishing to watch a movie that is intelligent, yet not complex at all, looks fantastic and raises many issues for you to ponder over afterwards should definitely catch this movie. The pace is perfect, it’s an interesting set up, well delivered in its execution and definitely needs more attention than it got at its cinema release.

Best Line:

For someone who was never meant for this world, I must confess I'm suddenly having a hard time leaving it. Of course, they say every atom in our bodies was once part of a star. Maybe I'm not leaving... maybe I'm going home.

Star Turn:

Ethan Hawke; 'inferior' than the rest but his confidence and slyness shine through.

Best Moment:

Unveiling how he can pass off as someone else

Review-Session 9

2009-06-27T17:30:00.010+01:00

Session 9 (2001) has become increasingly more popular these last few years. I remember when I first saw it most people hadn't heard of it and locating a DVD was a difficult task. But now it seems to be getting more of a cult status, and rightfully so. This isn't going to be one of the best movies ever, but it is certainly one you should see at least once.

The plot is simple; a struggling firm win a bid to remove the asbestos from a condemned building, which just happens to be a huge ex lunatic asylum that has been closed for 15 years. They have promised to get the entire job done in one week, maybe not long enough to get it done but certainly time enough for things to go wrong.

Gordy (Peter Mullan) is the boss and he's just had a new baby, which is making him very tired and drained lately. His second in command is Phil (David 'yeeeaaaaaaahhhhhh' Caruso) who has just lost his girl to fellow colleague Hank (Josh Lucas). Needless to say the pair don't get on at all. Also in the crew are Mike (co-writer Stephen Gevedon) who is Mr Exposition, he seems to know everything about the asylums past and Gordy's nephew Jeff (Brendan Sexton) with a prize winning mullet.

This is what David Caruso looks like sans-shades

Mike eventually finds some recordings of a patients sessions, nine in fact (dum dum dummmmmm) and cant help but listen to them, which is funny as most of the time the crew seem to be doing everything but work. I don't think they'll meet their one week deadline. On the recordings are a doctor asking patient Mary Hobbes about an incident in her life. Through these sessions, and an index card to spell it out for the really slow people, it is clear that she has another three personalities; Princess, Billy and the mysterious Simon. Throughout the week Mike makes his way through all the sessions but what will the ninth reveal?

Not the Golden Oldies he was expecting to listen to

Meanwhile, Hank is in the dark and creepy tunnels, marking up all the hazardous crap for removal, when he comes across a secret stash in the wall containing old coins, spectacles and assorted crap that might be worth quite a bit. He decides to come back later that night to collect it all, because the place isn't creepy enough in the daytime! So he comes back, grabs the stash, makes his way through some even darker and creepier tunnels, feels as though he is being pursued (a shot that made me crap myself the first time) and then runs into someone or something; end of scene. No surprise then that Hank doesn't show up the next day, after a phone call to his ex, Phil says that Hank told her he was going away and just left her.

As the week progresses we hear more of the sessions of Mary Hobbes, the two creepy alter-egos which are Princess and Billy, they refuse to talk about Simon. Gordy reveals to Phil that he had hit his wife and we see him on the phone to her several times asking to come home, he says he is staying at a motel in the meantime.

On the Thursday, Mullet Man sees Hank on a stairwell, staring out of a window with headphones on and some glasses. When questioned about where he's been he can only repeat ' what are you doing here'?' in a dazed manner. Jeff runs to get the others but when he brings them back Hank has gone (surprise surprise) so they all split up to try and find him. Suspicion is cast on Phil, did he really speak to his ex about Hank's whereabouts on the phone? Phil hates Hank doesn't he? Hmmm.

A bad time to have a mullet and a fear of the dark

Very soon afterwards things go bad very quickly and this is where the plot summary ends. I don't want to give more of it away as the movie has a slow pace that builds up to this moment and so the viewer should really experience it all for themselves. It is at this point that several questions have sprung up; what has happened to Hank? Has Phil done anything wrong, he's been acting strange? Has Gordy done something more than just hit his wife, he too has been acting strange? Who is the alter-ego Simon and what will be revealed in session nine of the recordings?

There are a few reasons why this movie ends up being a lot better than it would look on paper. First of all is the entire atmosphere that it creates. The whole thing is creepy beyond words, no to say the least the location of the asylum. It was filmed entirely at Danvers Mental Hospital, a truely awesome building architectually from the outside, designed like a giant bat, and a complete wreck inside. The claim is that all shots inside were filmed without having to dress up the set, it is as freaky in real life as it is in the movie. Director Brad Anderson made full use of his location as the movie is filled with dark rooms and corridors showing how bad this place really is and how stupid Hank must be to go there in the middle of the freaking night!

Welcome to the looney bin

Session 9 was obviously heavily inspired by movies such as The Shining, exploring themes about madness and schizophrenia, how insanity can infect someone. In fact for all intents and purposes, Danver State Hospital is the Overlook Hotel. The score is very limited but effective when it does pop up, including the opening credit, it quickly sets the right mood. Lighting is mostly natural and obviously very effective. All the elements go together well to set up the mood of the place and indeed of the movie.

Not all questions are answered directly by the close of the movie, some is left to interpretation, a lot more can be deduced by watching more than once as there are subtle clues. I like the fact that by the end, you are not entirely sure exactly what has gone on and that you have to think about it. For me it certainly makes it more creepy as I don't like to think about it after it's finished, I want to watch something more cuddly and wont prevent me from sleeping.

Definitely check this movie out, it is a slow build up and doesn't really contain any cheap scares like a lot of modern horror movies do. It is certainly in my top 5 movies that I have to gear myself up in order to watch, two others are Mulholland Drive and Don't Look Now.

Best Line:
What are you... doing... here?

Star Turn:
Peter Mullan; on the edge, you never know what to expect from him

Best Moment:
Hank in the asylum at night

Classic Scene-Mulholland Drive

2009-06-25T00:58:00.012+01:00

Here is a great scene from an amazing movie. Mulholland Drive, directed by David Lynch in 2001, is a Marmite movie; you'll either love it or hate. Whatever you decide, there is no escaping the fact that this movie contains some amazing scenes and fantastic imagery as it screws with your head.

This is a completely stand-alone scene as it appears early on in the movie and this is the first time we see the characters. In five minutes Lynch shows how to construct a scene from a simple conversation with two new characters and rapidly increase the tension and suspense until the audience isn't sure what is going to happen next.